Science experiment - is everything funny?

[Ahmabeliever]

I am making this thread to stop me from hijacking the quality jokes thread with comedy anecdotes and advice.

 

Here's how it works.

 

Someone poses a subject matter, and I/we try to make it funny.

 

You'll find it's an excellent mental exercise, rather fun.

 

We can also use this space to discuss and dissect comedy, the writing and performing of, etc.

 

Feel free to tell jokes too!

 

I'll start with an example, I'm going to get a random subject from hitting the link for the NZ Herald and choosing the first headline. Then I'll attempt to give it a dose of humour. Feel free to have a go too!

 

First bit of comic learning - there is a grieving period for topical material containing disaster. Some comics can touch on it that very night - (I heard a funny 9/11 line on the night) and 100's of bad 9/11 lines in the months following...

 

Here's the headline

 

"No recession but global slowdown means tax cuts needed"

 

Funny stuff huh! :hihi: What've I led myself into....:doh:

 

The global slowdown in recent news is interesting. This is of course due to global warming. The ice melting off the poles means the Earth is holding too much water, much like a fat person, movement is restricted, and heat makes it worse... so it is with the Earth slowing down.

 

Damn I picked a hard one....

 

If I had a recession like yours I'd be looking for hair implants not tax cuts.

[freeztar]

This should turn out to be a very fun thread. :doh:

 

Lets see...

 

"Everyone talks about global slowdown, due to a recession, and how we can fix it with tax cuts. It seems nobody has even considered Kryptonite."

 

(My humor is oblique)

 

"President Bush made a surprise move today in an attempt to fix the struggling economy. He boosted taxes 50%. When questioned about this strange move, Bush replied, "Well, taxes kinda sounds like Texas you know. And I love Texas."

 

(that one was stupid)

 

"Everyone thinks that cutting taxes can help the struggling economy, but what's the use in that. I think we should all take the economy out on a nice date, buy her a ring and be done with it."

 

(another stupid one :hihi:...brainstorming...:) )

[Ahmabeliever]

"Everyone talks about global slowdown, due to a recession, and how we can fix it with tax cuts. It seems nobody has even considered Kryptonite."

 

Excellent!

[Ahmabeliever]

I couldn't get a good funny out of that one but you sure did. The bush one is funny too, why? it's very easy to imagine.....

 

This brings to light an interesting point in writing comedy. There are no rules. It doesn't matter how oblique you are, if you can take your audience there with you, it will work.

 

Being able to draw crazy angles from a subject is an asset in comedy. Good language skills help as well.

 

ie: Tax. Government recently removed poster tax and they all fell down. The angle comes from the word tacks as opposed to a function or association of tax. Then there's a tax - attacks, tax evasion - sitting on the seat with no tacks, many ways to play with words in a comical manner.

 

By the way I make my examples up as I go so don't expect them to be funny. Hehe.

 

Wordplay is common, but puns are used sparingly, more of a 'corny' starch filler for the meat in the comedy roll.

 

Unless you thrash the puns in a very obvious manner...

 

Scaling it down my addiction to fishing traces back to when I was a sprat. Fresh out of my school I cast off into life determined to fillet, to find my plaice, my sole, I had no porpoise.

 

After using obviously cheap material you can add acknowledgement of the fact, always bearing in mind what are you doing on a comedy stage, make it funny...

 

ie: I know that material was full of puns but I'm saving the good stuff for an audience I like.

 

Sometimes the real clever ones don't work - morons in the crowd! Acknowledge that too - Hmm, that joke works when the audience isn't retarded. - This with a smile to follow- even if they are retarded! Your personal enjoyment performing rubs off, so have fun, it makes you funnier.

 

On stage you must back yourself up, don't apologise for anything, be loud and proud, unless the apology is funny.

 

In life, don't be such an ***.

[freeztar]

Excellent!

 

One out of three ain't bad I suppose. :hihi:

 

How about a new theme?

 

Let's see...

 

First headline on Yahoo (to follow the tradition):

 

"Cheney again links Iraq to Sept. 11 attacks"

 

Hmmm...another toughie...

 

"C'mon Cheney, nobody cares about your penis size. We know it's in your name and all, but get a grip...I recommend vasoline"

 

"Links? Off the cuff, links are pretty useless."

 

"There's something ironic about a guy named "Chain-ey" making links."

[InfiniteNow]

So, everyone is talking about this sub-prime thing, where people are losing their houses and having a hard time putting food on the table. What I'm wondering is, if everyone is having a hard time putting food on the table, why isn't there more talk about sub-prime meats?

 

<now I know how Freeztar felt>

[freeztar]

So, everyone is talking about this sub-prime thing, where people are losing their houses and having a hard time putting food on the table. What I'm wondering is, if everyone is having a hard time putting food on the table, why isn't there more talk about sub-prime meats?

 

Boooo! :eek2: ;)

It's workable. Perhaps something like this:

"Sub prime market leads to sub-prime meats. In other words, the disco bar is looking a lot like Taco Bell right now."

<now I know how Freeztar felt>

 

Yup. :)

But hey, it's brainstorming and an excellent mental exercise for those that are creatively inclined. :)

 

I think I have the wit to be a comic, but stage presence would be my downfall. The only way I could possibly hack it would be something like assuming the role of the late Mitch Hedberg (without the drugy weirdness of course).

 

I could never fill Mitch's shoes in this role, as he masterfully handles this particular heckler. Thinking on one's feet and being able to accept a joke thrown at you are true merits of a good comedian imho.

 

YouTube - Mitch Hedberg handles a heckler http://youtube.com/watch?v=q1LKVPSpIDA

 

I order a club sandwich all the time man and I don't know how I get away with it. :phones:

[Ahmabeliever]

Despite an exhaustive review of 600,000 Iraqi documents finding no evidence Saddam's regime had any operational links with the al Qaida terrorist network Cheney again links Iraq to Sept. 11 attacks.

 

"We're in the process of interrogating the reviewers now" States Cheney, we suspect they too are part of it.

[Ahmabeliever]

Freeztar - "Thinking on one's feet and being able to accept a joke thrown at you are true merits of a good comedian imho."

 

Definately. There are very few comics who can turn on their audience and get away with it, you can be really insulting, but you need to be having fun while letting them have it, not just letting them have it. The trick is to pause a couple seconds, see if anything pops up from what they've said, builds anticipation, gives you a chance to improvise and, if you think of nothing, throw in a standard heckler comeback and better luck next time.

 

I can't get the mitch link says it's not available but i love his stuff. Steven Wright is another excellent deadpan act.

 

I think you have the wit for it too.

 

Deadpan is great! It takes more time to tell less jokes and generally, as the audience gets to keep up, you get more laughs. Only hard part I found was keeping a straight face, or staying in character - I'd start getting animated. Especially if you have new stuff that still cracks you up.

[freeztar]

Although I understand the term "dead pan", I had to look it up to fulfill my sense of knowing. In the process, I found this excellent wiki: Comedy genres - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

Do you agree with this list AhmaB?

Your comments on this would be most appreciated (much respect). :phones:

[Ahmabeliever]

That's a great list.

 

I will add that many of those artists cross over into several of the sections. Some have likely played with all of them, others will show you many of those styles in one show.

 

I would also add musical comedy. - Wierd Al, Flight Of The Conchords, Gish, Corky & The Juice Pigs, Tenacious D, off the top of my head.

[Boerseun]

Latest headline on Yahoo - "Late wife's message found"

 

Ripping that one to pieces will inevitably end up in something that'll be right at home slap-bang in TheOnion.

 

Imagine...

 

"Chaos broke out on Tuesday evening in South London when mr. Nigel Smythe got home to an empty house. What appeared to be a normal case of being stuck in traffic took a turn for the worse when dinner time came around. A panicked mr. Smythe forced himself to sit down at the dinner table, where he set out plates, cutlery and condiments, showing a true British stiff upper lip in the face of adversity. Having donned a napkin, tidily stuck into his collar, he waited it out as the hours ticked by excrutiatingly slowly. Not being able to keep his demeanor any longer, he got up to phone for pizza delivery, where he came upon a note from his wife which informed him that she'll be late that night, having to finish off a project at work."

[alexander]

Bush will mark the fifth anniversary of the invasion of Iraq with a giant rave party; program includes a third world country leader hanging, numerous torture events, economic jello, if you have a life to loose, or money to blow, admissions are just under the price for a barrel of oil estimated for 2010, public is not welcome...

[Ahmabeliever]

EDIT! EDIT! EDIT!

 

In her last moments Susan Franks drove into a crowded intersection at speed while txting her husband. The grieving widower thinks the txt message killed his wife and wants mobile phone usage in vehicles banned.

 

The txt has been recovered - 'brakes feel spongy'.

 

SARCASM - sarcasm has been described as the lowest form of wit and is frowned upon even more so than puns. Why? Personally I think it has to do with the tone, sarcasm sounds more like a complaint, a disgruntled person, than an observation. When approaching political (or any) subjects you feel passionately about you can become 'unfunny' very quickly.

 

I personally don't touch politics unless it's a one liner, for this very reason. It ceases to be a comedy show and turns into a lecture.

 

People don't want to be challenged too much, think too much, they've paid money to be entertained. If they paid money and you are Bill Hicks, then yes, they want to hear what you have to say about the government, if they don't know who you are - rule number one - be funny.

 

The grieving period for disaster can also be applied to political humour and satire, however, it is you, the comic, that needs to get over it, or at least get a grip, before it is material for stage.

 

Sarcasm is done a lot in comedy, and done well, but not in a diatribe with no punch lines.

 

"Bush will mark the fifth anniversary of the invasion of Iraq with a giant rave party; program includes a third world country leader hanging, numerous torture events, economic jello, if you have a life to loose, or money to blow, admissions are just under the price for a barrel of oil estimated for 2010, public is not welcome..."

 

So you have something to say here, but it's not getting out, that's why it's long, you keep writing, the real emotion hasn't surfaced, I think what you meant to/would like to say was

 

I wish the Bush administration would just **** off and die.

 

Sometimes getting the real emotions/feelings out helps decrease the inner tension you carry concerning a subject, and the subject becomes usable material you can then talk about, not rant over.

 

So what if you went.... "Bush will mark the fifth anniversary of the invasion of Iraq with a giant rave party; program includes a third world country leader hanging, numerous torture events, economic jello, if you have a life to loose, or money to blow, or... ahh, stuff it, why doesn't he just **** off and die!

 

That's funny.

 

Why am I saying this type stuff - when you get on stage, you need your own personal issues either resolved or put on a shelf. If you can't do this be frank, not sarcastic.

 

If you've not learned to stop wearing your heart on your sleeve you will appear vulnerable(which looks like nervous), and this will make the audience nervous, and sympathetic, 2 emotions that don't belong in a comedy show. You may even scare some if too passionate, definately not the desired response.

 

As usual, there are exceptions to every rule. If your comedy style is going to be sarcastic, political or angry, then get on stage sooner rather than later and learn to deliver it palatably.

 

You can also switch styles, or build a character, test the water, have a go, if it's disastrous, try something else.

 

ps: I've seen some AWFUL acts get better, it took many years but they now get paid work. That being said, I'd never of hired them, they're just not that good. Filler is what I call acts like that, fine for club owners who want some cheaper acts to fill in the time slots, not for a promoter who wants the best tour he can put together. Again there are exceptions, and rarely would the public know the difference between filler and non filler, but I do, and discerning punters do. Here's a hint - filler acts all sound the same, cover the same stuff, do everything in 123 timing, callbacks, grossouts, black lines, use every trick in the book to enhance the lack of material.

 

Here's a home truth - EVERY ACT IS FILLER when they start out no matter how good they believe themselves to be, without stage time, you don't know what you are doing.

 

People with wit like freeztar before starting out, that's some serious potential.

 

The competition can be fierce, and many show people are completely vacuous wankers who'll kiss your cheeks and would love to see you dissapear (less competition). If the love and enjoyment aren't there, it is too steep a hill to climb. if you love it, though hard, it's a fantastic journey.

 

There is nothing stopping anyone from performing comedy at a hobby level, except themselves. Whether the public thinks it's comedy or not is a different story.

[Ahmabeliever]

PS - now I've made it sound hard - you know what you need to start - 5 minutes!

 

5 minutes of material is a fairly standard 'open mic' set. An open mic is a pro MC introducing new acts. Or sometimes a new act can be an open mic slot in a pro show.

 

5 minutes sounds like nothing, but on stage it is more than long enough to do a short routine.

 

Hint - write fifteen minutes (or more) then edit out everything you can except the funniest stuff, then have a go.

 

Some clubs are very strict on time limits. Get this right. Some won't have you back if you go over time. Learn the time slot they want, and learn to keep to it.

 

Many moons ago I was an amateur on holiday in Brisbane and the local club said I has 7 minutes. I went in and the set was changed to 5 - and I didn't know how to edit it there and then, I was first up....

 

I actually said no, I can't do it. - Had I lived in that town I could have screwed up a very good connection right there and then. Be prepared!

 

Lesson? - Learning the timing for chunks of material helps you change on the fly. Also, as you get better, and subsequent longer sets, you can chop and change your performance style just by accessing 'chunks' of material of similar length.

 

The boy/girl stuff is falling flat - pull out the mutant nijas and try that!

 

And timing - clubs shine a light in your face when you have one minute left, wind the set up with a good line, and get off. note - sometimes you don't see the light you're looking down or wherever... know your set, time your pieces.

[Thunderbird]

CNN Headline News, April 1 2008

Crawford Tx

President Bush shoots his own hunting dog after an unsuccessful hunting trip.

 

When reporters asked why he would do such a thing, the President stated........

[Ahmabeliever]

If the dog doesn't catch the pig, you eat the dog.