Observance of female-kind

[UncleAl]

There are no human females extant. Said sex was prehistorically exterminated and replaced by a space alien invasion force. The alien society collapsed before terrestrial conquest, but their sleeper agents live on. This can be trivially proven: Go camping with a female. They did not evolve in the wild.

[pamela]

How very interesting, thank you for the insights. I'm not sure though that our Mayor would be terribly attracted to ladies wearing ex army boots, mini skirts and exposed bosoms, then riding riding motor bicycles !

always worked for me;)

So unbecoming, so unfeminine, not chic at all.

now carlton, that is subjective, i am very feminine, boots, bike and all and so do not subscribe to what the media dictates as chic.

May I recommend Baroness Stafford's excellent book on etiquette and Mrs Beaton on house-hold management, as for sports a little tennis some croquet ( not to much as it excites).

now you sound like my mom, um, no thanks!

Driving unveiled is bad for the complexion, beer never never !!!!

there is nothing like the feel of wind on your face when you ride and beer and tequila when you pull over.....

[pamela]

There are no human females extant. Said sex was prehistorically exterminated and replaced by a space alien invasion force. The alien society collapsed before terrestrial conquest, but their sleeper agents live on. This can be trivially proven: Go camping with a female. They did not evolve in the wild.

now dearest Al, you have never been camping with me. I can have that tent pitched, a fire burning, and the java brewing, all while you are still unloading your laptop;)

[Pyrotex]

Can I bring my laptop, too? :D

Pleeeeezzzzz???

[pamela]

but of course o keeper of the flame:)

[lemit]

I have a feeling UncleAl would predefine womanhood in a way that would exclude you, Pamela.

 

--lemit

[pamela]

I have a feeling UncleAl would predefine womanhood in a way that would exclude you, Pamela.

 

--lemit

hmmm likely, i am sure.

Time to poke some fun at myself. Now remember, this thread was about observations and not stereotypes and most assurely not an absolute on anything. So i went shopping with the chicks on sunday...for hours......having opted as usual for the comfortable all terrain sneaker, my feet were in pretty good shape. However my friends were not. Their stylish heels kept getting taken off for the foot rub every so often, and of course out of view from spectators. I kinda felt bad for them, their feet hurt, but their ensembles looked fabulous!. Myself on the other hand, well, my britches were about 3x too big and my tee shirt was swallowing me alive. I simply cannot describe the look on my friends faces when i arrived at the cafe. I had played dress up for them before and honestly i could not deal with that again.Sure i looked good that time, an outfit that even Buffy and her daughter would give a thumbs up to, but comfort seemed a more better choice for the day.

Over the next few hours i mainly sat and chatted with the dressing room attendants, compiling shoe data, and of course being silly. A few husbands made eye contact as they saw me sitting there and gave the comforting nod and wink, that itt would indeed end, shopping sprees are simply not eternal. Now you wanna guess what store was next on this list? yep, the SHOE STORE. Now of course there was that part of me that was secretly savoring the moment to observe the shopper in action but even more, that oft denied pleasure of checking out the new boots. Yes, i will admit it...i love boots. Gosh, admitting is really the first step isnt it? secret boot addiction. I quickly recalled the 2 bins of boots that i packed into the storage unit under the scrutiny of my brother in law. Yeah, he had the look on his face that screamed i was full of it.My reasonable response of necessary varying work attire, did not quite fly with him. So busted i was and busted i remain.

interesting to note-the guys in the shoe store spent on an average twice as long checking out shoe styles and trying them on as did the females;)

[Chacmool]

I am baffled by many women's obsession with shoes and handbags. Why do they need so many? I have three pairs of shoes - slippers, sneakers and comfortable work shoes - and exactly one handbag, which I bought for about $10.

[pamela]

i dunno, chacmool, been trying to figure this one out too. When i peruse the boot bins in my mind, i try to take an objective look at why i purchased them. Sure, sometimes you need a different color for a particular outfit, but why do i have 6 pairs? no, these weren't purchased as a quick feel good for a bad hair day, every day is a bad hair day when you have curls that meet dreadlocks;) Just is what it is, and i have long since given up the fight with mother nature. From my high heeled boots for the maxi length skirt to the harley davidson riding boots, each, of course serves a purpose and a function. Now, when i asked my pals, why they were wearing uncomfortable shoes, they stated it was because they looked good. Now i ask you, how can they look good when their faces are all screwed up in pain? Who is looking at their shoes? Them? The way i figure it, if you want to be noticed, then smile.:wub:

[Buffy]

I have a feeling UncleAl would predefine womanhood in a way that would exclude you, Pamela.

hmmm likely, i am sure.

Oh no, Uncle Al is a Southern Cal kinda guy, and I picture him hanging out on the beach in his Katins (he knows what I'm talking about) with his Heineken, and quite happy to chat with any ladies who stop to chat, whether they're in bikinis or tees, cutoffs and boots. :P

So i went shopping with the chicks on sunday...for hours......having opted as usual for the comfortable all terrain sneaker, my feet were in pretty good shape. However my friends were not. Their stylish heels kept getting taken off for the foot rub every so often, and of course out of view from spectators.

Now wait a second. Not to diss your friends but this is an intelligence test... Now I will admit that I do get dressed up if I'm shopping Midtown or the Upper East Side or if in London around and about Chelsea, but you'll also see me taking a taxi to cover the 3 blocks between Henri Bendel and Hermes.

 

Mall shopping in the 'burbs, I'm much more likely to dress like you pam...shopping = tennies....

 

Speaking of New York and shoes though, the idiot guys all wear their dress shoes walking around town, where as all the women put on their tennies to go *anywhere* except out to dinner or a party, where we expect there to be a cab or a limo involved.

 

You tell me who's smarter when it comes to Manhattan...

 

Oh and LA: even at the Beverly Center you'll mostly see the stars and wanna-bees in fliip flops...

...A few husbands made eye contact as they saw me sitting there and gave the comforting nod and wink, that itt would indeed end, shopping sprees are simply not eternal.

Oh I guess its sacrilege or something, but I've done my share of flirting with lost hubby's and boyfriends (always important to look for a ring first though....).... :evil:

Yes, i will admit it...i love boots.

See? It is genetic.... :cheer:

interesting to note-the guys in the shoe store spent on an average twice as long checking out shoe styles and trying them on as did the females;)

...and so--refer back to the dress shoe item above--we really are *not* the crazy ones....

I am baffled by many women's obsession with shoes and handbags. Why do they need so many? I have three pairs of shoes - slippers, sneakers and comfortable work shoes - and exactly one handbag, which I bought for about $10.

You're still a fashion plate compared with Mother Teresa... :hihi:

 

Oh and I'll betcha pam eschews slippers for a nice thick pair of hiking boot socks! I admit it: so do I!

 

i dunno, chacmool, been trying to figure this one out too. When i peruse the boot bins in my mind, i try to take an objective look at why i purchased them. Sure, sometimes you need a different color for a particular outfit, but why do i have 6 pairs? no, these weren't purchased as a quick feel good for a bad hair day... Just is what it is, and i have long since given up the fight with mother nature.

There you have it. And there's always a well-justified excuse. But worse, as your wardrobe varies, the more combinations there are to justify.

 

The last pair of shoes I bought were justified by the new cocktail dress I bought that had red piping on the bottom and side peek-a-boo slit. I had no shoes that matched! Yikes!

...they stated it was because they looked good. Now i ask you, how can they look good when their faces are all screwed up in pain? Who is looking at their shoes? Them? The way i figure it, if you want to be noticed, then smile.:)

Gotta stop wearing the tees pam: they *all* look at your boobs first...well, if they're visible! :eek: :evil:

 

But really, we don't just do this for the guys: it's communication to other women too. Not necessarily positive or negative, just "do you think like me or not." I think guys do it too: Bud/football vs. scotch/rugby. What do you think they're wearing?

 

Chac: don't worry, I *really* admire frugality, and being able to *avoid* the culturally supported competition is quite frankly amazing! :cheer:

 

Fashion can be bought. Style one must possess, ;)

Buffy

[pamela]

Now wait a second. Not to diss your friends but this is an intelligence test... Now I will admit that I do get dressed up if I'm shopping Midtown or the Upper East Side or if in London around and about Chelsea, but you'll also see me taking a taxi to cover the 3 blocks between Henri Bendel and Hermes.

 

Mall shopping in the 'burbs, I'm much more likely to dress like you pam...shopping = tennies....

well these chicks dress up for everything except cooking and even then there is nothing sloppy about them.They are very elegant in both speech and dress and even the quick cup of java at their houses is served in fine china with fancy pastries. You know, the kinda chick my ma was hoping i would turn out to be;) I reckon she should have made me give up my Craftsman's tools early on and sent me to charm school instead of my sister:hihi:

 

Speaking of New York and shoes though, the idiot guys all wear their dress shoes walking around town, where as all the women put on their tennies to go *anywhere* except out to dinner or a party, where we expect there to be a cab or a limo involved.

 

You tell me who's smarter when it comes to Manhattan...

 

Oh and LA: even at the Beverly Center you'll mostly see the stars and wanna-bees in fliip flops...

yeah i will admit that after shopping for hours in the City in my heels, i opted to buy some keds just to be able to make it to the subway. It looked terrible with the outfit but i fit in with the rest of the NY females

Oh I guess its sacrilege or something, but I've done my share of flirting with lost hubby's and boyfriends (always important to look for a ring first though....)....

was i flirting?:phones:

See? It is genetic....

yep, have to agree!

...and so--refer back to the dress shoe item above--we really are *not* the crazy ones....

hey now, i never said we females are crazy-a little OCD about the shoes maybe tho:hihi:

Oh and I'll betcha pam eschews slippers for a nice thick pair of hiking boot socks! I admit it: so do I!

i love those!

There you have it. And there's always a well-justified excuse. But worse, as your wardrobe varies, the more combinations there are to justify.

 

The last pair of shoes I bought were justified by the new cocktail dress I bought that had red piping on the bottom and side peek-a-boo slit. I had no shoes that matched! Yikes!

if we exchange the word excuse to reason in the above, we are well on the way to rule the world!!

Gotta stop wearing the tees pam: they *all* look at your boobs first...well, if they're visible!

oh trust me there was a reason to switch to the tees, now eye contact is actually possible!!

But really, we don't just do this for the guys: it's communication to other women too. Not necessarily positive or negative, just "do you think like me or not." I think guys do it too: Bud/football vs. scotch/rugby. What do you think they're wearing?

yes, women dress for other women, but women know, the men are always looking whether your tee is tight or not:)

[lemit]

I think I need to defend myself.

 

Buffy, I was talking about UncleAl's online personna. His life as a human being is not my business, just as I would like to preserve my own personal life.

 

Okay. I have something I have to admit. It turns out I'm really really a 15 year old girl. I'm hoping to be on NBC's Dateline. Do we have any middle aged men around here who'd like to get together sometime? I really have a lot to learn about life. I just need to find somebody who can teach me.

 

Gushing and giggling (and very vulnerable),

 

--lemit

[Moontanman]

I think I need to defend myself.

 

Buffy, I was talking about UncleAl's online personna. His life as a human being is not my business, just as I would like to preserve my own personal life.

 

All right, I do have something to admit. It turns out that I am in reality a 15 year old girl. I'm hoping to be on NBC's Dateline. Do we have any middle aged men around here who'd like to get together sometime? I really have a lot to learn about life. I just need to find somebody who can teach me.

 

Gushing and giggling (and very vulnerable),

 

--lemit

 

WOW! Now it all makes sense! Contact me off list for further instructions B)

[Pyrotex]

WOW! Now it all makes sense! Contact me off list for further instructions :naughty:

Get in line, MooMan! :)

[pamela]

now might be a good time to take a comprehensive look into what drives the male mind;)

although after the last three posts, i shan't have to dig too deeply

[freeztar]

now might be a good time to take a comprehensive look into what drives the male mind;)

although after the last three posts, i shan't have to dig too deeply

 

:)

 

Yeah, it wouldn't be much of a thread. :naughty:

[Buffy]

... i shan't have to dig too deeply

Oh I think a feather duster would do the trick... :naughty: :evil:

 

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily this is not difficult, :)

Buffy