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  • 1 month later...
Posted
:) what bohm meant, or should have meant, ...[is] nothing is not connected. when nothing is not connected, you can always tell.

Hello? Anyone here? Are we ready for the next analysis of nothing?

- Yessir! Ready when you are, sir!

You again? I thought I put six bullets through your chest.

- You did, sir, but nothing happened.

Nothing happened?

- Yessir! It was like a miracle. It was caused by the nothing in the analyzer.

What nothing?

- The nothing that was in a dual quantum state!

Are we going through this again?

- No. Listen. The nothing was both the same, and new, at the same time!

And this saved you from the bullets?

- Kind of. An almost nil beam of collimated naser night was fired through the sample!

And...?

- In the exact instant that the nothing was in a dual state, and so nothing happened!

But I thought you said that nothing had to be either ...

- Wait! Not according to Turtle Bohm's Law: "Nothing is not connected."

Right. So, the nothing wasn't connected? And that means?

- Basically, sir, it means that if you punch a dual-quantum-state sample of nothing with an infinitesimal beam of naser night, then the nothing is not connected to cause-and-effect reality, and can instantaneously be anywhere and everywhere at the same time, uncausing almost anything to unhappen -- which if you apply Boole's Laws to, becomes, "nothing happens"! See?

Why, yes I do. When you explain nothing that way, nothing is more obvious.

- Exactly, sir! So how could I be dead if nothing happened?

Riiiiiiight.

- Will there be anything else, sir?

Uhhh, yes. What about the new analysis of nothing?

- Well, we could do that, sir, but it looks like we can't avoid a dual-quantum-state.

Do you mean if you analyze the nothing, then nothing will happen?

- Absolutely sir. When nothing's not connected, you can always tell.

Well show me, I want to see this for myself.

- Okay. 3. 2. 1. Fire! Will there be anything else, sir?

Uhhh, yes. What about the new analysis of nothing?

- Well, we could do that, sir, but it looks like we can't avoid a dual-quantum-state.

Do you mean if you analyze the nothing, then nothing will happen?

- Absolutely sir. When nothing's not connected, you can always tell.

Well show me, I want to see this for myself.

- Okay. 3. 2. 1. Fire! Will there be anything else, sir?

Uhhh, yes. What about the new analysis of nothing? ...

 

PREV -- NEXT

Posted
Hello? Anyone here? Are we ready for the next analysis of nothing?

- Yessir! Ready when you are, sir!

You again? I thought I put six bullets through your chest.

 

nothing is not connected ≡ everything is connected.

 

check your foot, sir. :)

Posted

 

I too had nothing to say, so I came to this thread for inspiration, and found "nothing."

 

Here is what ensued:

 

The answer about the question of "nothing" lies in the physicality of the four-dimensional continuum and the evolution of systems contained in it. Here, both observed and unobserved facts are undoubtedly the absolute authority. There is nothing supernatural about it, nothing fanciful, nothing imaginary, nothing fantastic, nothing whimsical or chimerical, nothing unbelievable, out of this world, or far-fetched, nothing bizarre, nothing spectacular and nothing invented.

 

Yet something has been created from "nothing."

 

 

Lol

CC

  • 1 month later...
Posted

Okay, did we get any results on the last experiment?

- Here it is sir! I've found it!

What have you found?

- The quantum particles that mediate nothing!

Quantum particles?

- Yes! The Nothon! The smallest indivisible unit of nothing!

Wait. Are you telling me that nothing is quantized?

- Correct, sir! This will completely overthrow quantum mechanics!

How so?

- QM says that energy and matter are quantized. But now we have proven that...

Nothing is quantized! What a breakthrough! Outstanding job!

- There was nothing to it, sir!

So, exactly how "big" is a Nothon?

- Well, sir, it comes out to 3.14 nanoneganillitrons.

Nanoneganillitrons?

- Yessir. Billionths of a neganillitron.

Neganillitron?

- Yessir. The complex, anti-symmetric negation of a nillitron expressed in metric units.

Nillitron?

- Yessir. The largest indivisible mass that is indistinguishable from its anti-mass.

Weird. What is this largest indivisible mass?

- Well, sir, it is 2.718 giganegakilograms eye hertz electron volt per meter second squared.

I hurts?

- Uhhh... that's the square root of minus one, sir. And Hertz, like cycles per second.

That's bizarre. And what, pray tell, is a negakilogram?

- That's just another way of saying a bilateral metric Nothon, sir.

Hmmmm... Are you telling me that the definition of the Nothon is circular?

- Absolutely, sir! Isn't that brilliant? The existence of the Nothon is self-proving!

What?

- Yes! There's nothing else like it in all of physics!

Listen, why don't you turn off the nothing analyzer -- unplug it -- while I go get my gun...

 

PREV -- NEXT

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