Annex Mexico!

[Buffy]

With all the protests and Congressional/Executive Branch follies this week, a quartet of us were going through a second bottle of fine wine at one of our favorite local establishments and ruminating on the responses proposed so far, and pondering the question, "Well, what *else* could be done?"

 

Then the lightning bolt hit. Its *obvious*...

 

We should annex Mexico!

 

Think of all the reasons why:

• Eliminate hidden economy - Illegal aliens are popular with business because they are underground: no need to pay minimum wage, no need for payroll taxes, no benefits, but most importantly, no one to complain because if they do they get deported. If they're no longer illegal, they will report labor violations, poor working conditions, etc. and soon it will all be above board.
  
• Energy independence - Did'ja know that Mexico is one of the biggest oil exporters in the world? And the oil industry's nationalized, which we could break up and sell to the multinational oil firms that would be beholden to the Republicans? (They are, aren't they?)
  
• Monetary export - One of the biggest arguments against illegal aliens is that they do not contribute to the GDP because they export their earnings. But now, if they are sending it back to the family in Oaxaca, its still in the US.
  
• Tax recovery - They "use services but don't pay taxes." Why don't they pay taxes? Again, because they're illegal. Above board employment and the tax receipts go up.
  
• Reduced incentive to "emigrate" - Mexico suffers from being controlled by socialists: even their "right wing" the PRI--"Institutional Revolutionary Party (is that Orwellian "Newspeak" or what?) is socialist, and you should see the parties to the left of them! Now if we just got some honest to God capitalists in there, we'd have places that they'd wanna work at in no time!
  
• Boomer Dump - While much has been made of the illegals coming this way, you should see the flood going the other direction. Everyone at the table the other night had *many* relatives moving permanently to places like Puerta Vallarta and La Paz. You can sell your tiny ranch home in California, move to Baja and live like royalty, in towns that are becoming *filled* with Gringos. Ole!
  
• Beat Re-Mexification - Some of the more radical groups pushing the "illegal agenda" have openly talked about biding their time until there is a Latino majority--which most demographers say is only a few decades away--and then voting to have the Southwestern states seceed and join Mexico: the will is there even among Latinos, so we might as well beat them to the punch, eh?
  

We actually kept going on but the alcohol got in the way of remembering it all.

 

Now lets be practical though, fine motivations, but how are you gonna pull it off?

• Invade - Why not? Have you seen their army? Go in about siesta time and it will all be over by Margarita hour. Rummy would *love* to show off his "rapid reaction" force to prove that yes, it is possible for 100 guys in M1's with air support and precision munitions to take over an entire nation, and show that the naysayers were wrong about his military strategy in Iraq. And Dick will vouch for the fact that the oppressed people of Mexico will dance in the streets and welcome us as liberators with open arms! There's of course ample proof that Mexico--as an oil producing nation--is in contact with Arabs who also sell oil and they are from countries that have people in them who at least used to support al Qaeda, and therefore we need a pre-emptive strike to prevent that wacko Presidente Fox from providing WMDs to evildoers. And it might just save the Republicans in November!
  
• Coup - It hasn't been done in so long, who would guess? Find some likely puppet and send in the CIA! Annexation would only be a year away!
  
• Politics - This is a wild one: do it *legally*! I'll betcha LA Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa prolly has a brother who, when teamed up with Karl Rove and enough money could probably get the Mexican electorate to *vote in* a team that would then agree to the annexation without *any* conflict!
  

Fresh ideas. That's what we need in Washington!

 

Modestly proposed,

Buffy

[Racoon]

haha thats a good one! :hyper:

 

Maybe eventually in the future. :)

NAFTA put us on that road already.

It would take CONSIDERABLE time and effort and Capital.

 

Maybe Mexico doesn't want to be annexed.

Seems they have tremendous pride in their country; even coming over here illegally to wave their flag. :phones:

 

We should Annex Canada too while we're at it...

 

A nice propsosal Buffy, :) but one of those things that sounds better on paper than in reality. (like socialism)

 

Lets sweep off our own porch first,

Racoon.

[Boerseun]

Nice brain-exercise!

 

The only problem I can see, is that once you've taken over Mexico, and built up the economy to stabilize the place and make some bucks for the locals, (quite a few decades, at best), you'll be presented with an all new Third-World border problem at the South, with Guatemalans crossing the border in droves! The you annex Guatemala! Then, you've got Hondurans and El Salvadorans crossing the border, so you'll have to annex there, as well. Then, Nicaragua, Costa Rica, Panama, Colombia, Venezuela, Brazil, and before you realise it, you're at Tierra del Fuego!

 

You should take Canada while you're at it, and then call the place the United States of America. Both North and South, the USABNaS!!! At least then you could refer to the USA as 'America', with some justification, this time.

[Racoon]

When I said we should annex Canada too- I didn't mean French Quebec! :xx: :doh:

[Buffy]

... once you've taken over Mexico, and built up the economy to stabilize the place and make some bucks for the locals... you'll have to annex [Guatemala] as well. Then, Nicaragua, Costa Rica, Panama, Colombia, Venezuela, Brazil, and before you realise it, you're at Tierra del Fuego!

Ah, yup... its called Manifest Destiny or more modernly, Neo-con Crack... :xx:

 

44-40 or fight? Pshaw, that's for losers! :doh:

 

Spreading democracy,

Buffy

[Racoon]

Seriously though,

 

We can't afford Health Care for Americans or the coming Baby-Boomers Social Security.

 

Let alone try to fix Mexico's problems and bring all them up to standards.

Hell, we can't even pay for the 10 million Illegals - let alone another 90 million!

 

I suppose after a couple Dirty-Bombs go off here, Mexico might not sound so bad. ;)

 

As for Venezuela - that a whole new sh*t storm.

I was there for Golpe De Estado. but not Chavez's election.

 

Venezuela has considerable oil and natural resources. And President Chavez is very Anti-American.

I watch that news closely...:doh:

and Chavez is a big reason I don't go back.

 

My idea was to bring Slurpee Machines down there. :xx: ;) No bull.

I knew I needed a good slurpee after 5 hours in THAT heat...

[Turtle]

Then the lightning bolt hit. Its *obvious*...

 

We should annex Mexico!

...

[*]Politics - This is a wild one: do it *legally*! I'll betcha LA Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa prolly has a brother who, when teamed up with Karl Rove and enough money could probably get the Mexican electorate to *vote in* a team that would then agree to the annexation without *any* conflict!

Fresh ideas. That's what we need in Washington!

 

Modestly proposed,

Buffy

 

Modestly accepted. Option connected. Descent rejected. Lawyers injected. Mexico annexted. Hawaii reflected. Nothing objected. :xx:

[Qfwfq]

SPQR

 

 

z

[Turtle]

SPQR

 

 

z

 

Que? Que es blanco zed? Not a new plan you say? :doh: Please expound Q; the game is afoot.:xx:

[TheBigDog]

Why invade? We should just pay cash. Land is cheap down there.

 

Bill

[Buffy]

Why invade? We should just pay cash. Land is cheap down there.

We are! See "Boomer Dump" above. I've got 3 sets of Aunts/Uncles down there right now! Odd twist is that the current Mexican law says that if you sell property in mexico, you have to pay a huge tax if you move it elsewhere, so its actually encouraging the Gringos to become land barons there. The commercial real estate companies (esp resorts) are moving in big time...

 

¡Compre México ahora!

Buffy

[TheBigDog]

We are! See "Boomer Dump" above. I've got 3 sets of Aunts/Uncles down there right now! Odd twist is that the current Mexican law says that if you sell property in mexico, you have to pay a huge tax if you move it elsewhere, so its actually encouraging the Gringos to become land barons there. The commercial real estate companies (esp resorts) are moving in big time...

 

¡Compre México ahora!

Buffy

My grandparents used to have a house in Mexico. It was a whole American community. This was back in the late 70's. Trouble was that the laws for foreign ownership are so strict, and the legal system so different than the US that many people end up "purchasing" through a Mexican holding company of some kind, and actually don't own the land. If Mexico would open up land ownership to US citizens it would spur their economy like nothing else ever has.

 

It is getting easier in somoe areas, but that has much to do with deals you can make with local officials - on the books but off the books. :confused: :naughty:

 

bill

[InfiniteNow]

So, do you propose this as a 51st state, or would we just make Texas and California larger, taking back the title from Alaska? :doh:

[pgrmdave]

I don't think that our Constitution would allow for us to add onto states, so it would have to add to the states.

[Buffy]

So, do you propose this as a 51st state, or would we just make Texas and California larger...

You folks in Texas are already too big for your britches! No land grabs!

 

Those 50 stars are so boring: almost 50 years without a change, we need a revamp! Adding another 32 stars would be a fine addition! Maybe Turtle can come up with a geometrically pleasing arrangement of 82 stars!

 

I find after further research though, that this has been simultaneously invented in *many* places, so my friends and I can claim no priority on the idea. Try googling "annex mexico": its a hoot!

 

¡Viva Los Estados Unidos!

Buffy

[Turtle]

Maybe Turtle can come up with a geometrically pleasing arrangement of 82 stars!

Viva Los Estados Unidos!

Buffy

 

At your command m'lady. 82 is one more than 81 which is a perfect sqaure and as Trimtab told me that a perfect square maps onto a 'perfect ' triangle, I propose a 9X9X9 + 1 equilateral triangular matrix of stars, with the final star 'flagging' off the outer lower corner.

Oh say I can See,

Turtler

[Queso]

At your command m'lady. 82 is one more than 81 which is a perfect sqaure and as Trimtab told me that a perfect square maps onto a 'perfect ' triangle, I propose a 9X9X9 + 1 equilateral triangular matrix of stars, with the final star 'flagging' off the outer lower corner.

Oh say I can See,

Turtler

 

what about 81 stars all in one triangular point of one larger star?

 

It would be small, hard to draw, but with a large scale and some detail it would be a hoot like Buffy's annexed googling.

 

Either way, Turtle you have brilliant numerical insight,

visually your description occured.

You see

in shell.

 

See you in shell.