What is Love?

[HydrogenBond]

I do not think there is one definition of love. One can love baseball, love junk food, love children, love women, loves one's mate, love one's parents, love humanity, etc. Some love involves joy, other desire, other pain, other concern, and other rest. Love and rest may be the purest form of love, unblended with other motivations, i.e., home.

[hallenrm]

Love is a very interesting riddle, so interesting, that everyone like to engage oneself into, without knowing its meaning and significance!!!:hihi: :D :) :) :)

[InfiniteNow]

  Saitia said:

"God is love."

 

 

Because God indwells your mind.

No; God is Spirit.

Increasing awareness of it; willingness to share it.

Because it's Divine.

Hm. I love lots of things and beings; more all the time.

 

Through science we discover the material world; we use religion to evaluate it, and philosophy to interpret its meanings, while we harmonize our scientific/material viewpoint with our religious/spiritual concept.

Our budding consciousness of the Indwelling Spirit is based on our intellectual reception of truth, the soul perception of goodness, and our personality motivation to love. But our greatest spiritual jeopardy consists in the predicament of our unfinished growth; i.e., forsaking the evolutionary religions of fear, without immediately grasping the revelatory religion of love.

 

 

But since I've rejected your first premise, the rest of your post fell apart.

[HappytheStripper]

The word love appears in many contexts: there’s maternal love, familial love, romantic love, sexual love, a wider love for fellow humans and religious love for God, to name but a few. Some cultures have ten or more words for different forms of love, and poets and songwriters always find myriad aspects of love to celebrate.

 

The science of love is still in its infancy. Yet scientists are beginning to get early insights into the nature and origin of love. We can now look inside human brains to view changing patterns of activity and biochemical changes that take place during love, explore diverse human experiences of love, study how we select mates and woo lovers, and look for the evolutionary roots of love.

 

Addicted to love

So what exactly is going on during the rollercoaster of euphoria and despair that is falling in love?

 

In the brain, romantic love shows similarities to going mildly insane or suffering from obsessive compulsive disorder. Studies show that when you first fall in love, serotonin levels plummet and the brain's reward centres are flooded with dopamine. This gives a high similar to an addictive drug, creating powerful links in our minds between pleasure and the object of our affection, and meaning we crave the hit of our beloved again and again.

 

Lust is driven by sex hormones such as testosterone, which can go off-kilter too. As can levels of the stress hormone cortisol, and the amphetamine-like chemical phenylethlyamine, increasing excitement.

 

Other hormones, oxytocin and vasopressin, kick in later and appear to be crucial for forming long-term partnerships. Couples who have been together for several years show increased brain activity associated with these chemicals, when they look at pictures of their partner. Oxytocin is produced when couples have sex and touch, kiss and massage each other - the hormone makes us more trusting, helps overcome "social fear" and is important for bonding.

 

Brain scans of people in love show that the old adage "love is blind" really is true. While the dopamine reward areas are excited in love, regions linked with negative emotions and critical social judgement switch off.

[Saitia]

  InfiniteNow said:

But since I've rejected your first premise, the rest of your post fell apart.

 

No; your understanding falls apart; my post stays the same.

[Saitia]

  HappytheStripper said:

The word love appears in many contexts: there’s maternal love, familial love, romantic love, sexual love, a wider love for fellow humans and religious love for God, to name but a few. Some cultures have ten or more words for different forms of love, and poets and songwriters always find myriad aspects of love to celebrate.

 

Nicely said. :)

 

 

 

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Studies show that when you first fall in love, serotonin levels plummet and the brain's reward centres are flooded with dopamine. This gives a high similar to an addictive drug, creating powerful links in our minds between pleasure and the object of our affection, and meaning we crave the hit of our beloved again and again.

Wow; imagine a couple after fifty years of marriage; getting high over and over and over and over. . . too much is never enough. So you think they're just junkies? ;)

 

 

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Oxytocin is produced when couples have sex and touch, kiss and massage each other - the hormone makes us more trusting, helps overcome "social fear" and is important for bonding.

Is this true of couples who have been together for several decades?

 

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Brain scans of people in love show that the old adage "love is blind" really is true. While the dopamine reward areas are excited in love, regions linked with negative emotions and critical social judgement switch off.

Science (and scientists) will have a lot of fun investigating the physical aspects of love, to be sure. I'd like to read some of their grant applications. :) But love— divine love— will remain elusive to such investigations, unless of course the investigators fall in love with God. As this comprehension of love of Deity finds spiritual expression in the lives of God-knowing mortals, they yield the fruits of divinity: intellectual peace, social progress, moral satisfaction, spiritual joy, and cosmic wisdom. They have learned that love is the greatest thing in the universe— and they know that God is love.

[Wondering]

  Saitia said:

 

 

Science (and scientists) will have a lot of fun investigating the physical aspects of love, to be sure. I'd like to read some of their grant applications. :rolleyes: But love— divine love— will remain elusive to such investigations, unless of course the investigators fall in love with God. As this comprehension of love of Deity finds spiritual expression in the lives of God-knowing mortals, they yield the fruits of divinity: intellectual peace, social progress, moral satisfaction, spiritual joy, and cosmic wisdom. They have learned that love is the greatest thing in the universe— and they know that God is love.

 

Personally, I believe in a higher power. But I believe that higher power created science to make things like love work.

 

I never thought about how much of a conflicting issue 'love' could be. I disagree with quite a few of the posts on here, but I'm a stubborn taurus.

 

Could one reason why Love is so conflicting be because we associate it with religion?

 

In my thinking, Love is more of an attachment. When we get attached or used to something, we can't get enough of it and we love it. When we are babies we get attached to our mothers through science and from being around them all the time, so we love them even if they are a terrible person.

 

In a marriage, I would like to believe that it was meant to be, that some higher force brought two together. But I think that's just my desire for something romantic and magical (or something).

 

But then there is the love you have to have for yourself, which is more like a confidence thing. And it's a love that some people have to force themselves into.

 

So maybe the thing with Love is that it has so many meanings. I think there would be a different science aspect to every different aspect of love.

[IDMclean]

*Climbs onto his soapbox*

 

I believe, that if love exists, it is a complex net of thoughts provoking emotional response and triggering memories related to both pleasant and unpleasant neural paths. Emotion being regulated by receptors through out your cellular structure and the hypothalamus.

 

Love to my eyes is like anger, a secondary emotion, arising from a number of primary emotions and Thought-Memory motions.

[InfiniteNow]

  Saitia said:

No; your understanding falls apart; my post stays the same.

 

Whoa... Yeah... oww...

 

Got me there, didn't ya? You really showed me the light, huh?

 

 

Hey God... ya there buddy?

 

It seems you love Saita and not me. I don't believe in you. Is that going to be a problem at some point?

 

 

  Nurse in background said:

Hey InfiniteNow, hun... you forgot to take your meds this morning. You're talking to an elevator.

[Southtown]

Hey God... ya there buddy?   It seems you love Saita and not me. I don't believe in you. Is that going to be a problem at some point?   HAHAHAHAHAAHAAAA!!!

/forums/images/smilies/banana_sign.gif

That is totally bad ***!! These forums ROCK!!

 

  Wondering said:

Personally, I believe in a higher power. But I believe that higher power created science to make things like love work.

Science is just a method. But I think I know what you're saying.

 

  Wondering said:

I never thought about how much of a conflicting issue 'love' could be. I disagree with quite a few of the posts on here, but I'm a stubborn taurus.

 

Could one reason why Love is so conflicting be because we associate it with religion?

Any supernatural or spiritual suggestions will of course get flamed. I think though that the main difference between viewpoints is deterministic vs. creationistic. Or meaningful vs. unmeaningful, etc.

 

While there are some who prefer to be masters of their own destiny, there are others who prefer to be a part of the greater whole. It has been my experience that scientific arguments don't normally convince either to change viewpoint.

 

Don't get me wrong, I have plenty of faith in the sciences. I just don't agree with science solely on merit. I have to scrutinize everything. My curse then is to be a theory unto myself, and a denomination of one.

 

Just me and what I see, FTW.

[HappytheStripper]

  Saitia said:

Wow; imagine a couple after fifty years of marriage; getting high over and over and over and over. . . too much is never enough. So you think they're just junkies? :shade:

 

Yes .. Love is only a word .. used to describe the actions of people ..

 

The act of "falling in love" can be a magical expereince .. should this magic fade (as it does) and daily life begins to take-over .. one may begin to crave this magic again and again and again .. This often happens at times when one feels dis-connected ..

 

Just as a drug produces a chemical reaction .. so does falling in love or being in love produce a chemical reaction ..

 

The the dis-connection one may feel from the very specific need of being in love may be described as a deficient need .. see Abraham Maslows' Heirachy of Needs ..

 

The ability to love is dependant upon many factors .. including self-love ..

 

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Is this true of couples who have been together for several decades?

 

Yes .. I have known my husband for over 20 years ..

 

 

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Science (and scientists) will have a lot of fun investigating the physical aspects of love, to be sure. I'd like to read some of their grant applications. :) But love— divine love— will remain elusive to such investigations, unless of course the investigators fall in love with God. As this comprehension of love of Deity finds spiritual expression in the lives of God-knowing mortals, they yield the fruits of divinity: intellectual peace, social progress, moral satisfaction, spiritual joy, and cosmic wisdom. They have learned that love is the greatest thing in the universe— and they know that God is love.

 

Science is only the study of .. or .. observation of .. the philosophy of what is observed is then left open to interpretation ..

 

Whilst people continue to question the idea of love .. one needs only to know love .. within the self .. the highest power of all ..

 

Regards Ashley

[InfiniteNow]

  HappytheStripper said:

The the dis-connection one may feel from the very specific need of being in love may be described as a deficient need .. see Abraham Maslows' Heirachy of Needs ..

 

Beneficial also would be the concept of desensitization...

[IDMclean]

Is there a difference between familial love and true love?

[HappytheStripper]

  KickAssClown said:

Is there a difference between familial love and true love?

 

What is your definition of "true love??"

 

Familial love is like the love we have for a mother .. father .. brother .. sister .. and so on ..

 

The act of true love in my eyes would be .. self love .. which is one of the first characteristics required for having an ability to love others ..

 

Looking forward to your reply ..

 

Ashley

[IDMclean]

I don't have a definition of love. To me love is a secondary emotion, like anger.

 

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Primary (i.e., innate) emotions, such as fear, "depend on limbic system circuitry," with the amygdala and anterior cingulate gyrus being "key players".

 

Secondary emotions (i.e., feelings attached to objects [e.g., to dental drills], events, and situations through learning) require additional input from the prefrontal and somatosensory cortices. The stimulus may still be processed directly via the amygdala but is now also analyzed in the thought process. Thoughts and emotions are interwoven: every thought, however bland, almost always carries with it some emotional undertone, however subtle.

 

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Geneally speaking, secondary feelings do not identify the unmet emotional need (UEN). When all I can say is "I feel angry," neither I nor any one else knows what would help me feel better. A helpful technique, then, is to always identify the primary emotion.

 

Love is related to sympathy, affection, attraction, trust, respect, and admiration. I don't believe in unconditional love. I believe all relationships are based in boundaries, in understandings and limits. Not so much as to what can be done but rather what can't be done.

 

I am unsure as to wheather or not I have ever experienced "love", wheather true or not. I asked the question because i am interested to read what other's think on the subject.

 

<EDIT: Source of interest: Limerence, or Emotional Passion>

[Southtown]

Love is the answer, buddy.

[HydrogenBond]

HappySmartExotic, your definitions and chemical correlation of love is quite insightful. I think I am in love. The only thing I would add, with respect to a psychological angle, is the affect of personality software. This angle is an extension of Jungian psychology.

 

Love and falling in love, are collective human expressions, that are same within all humans, present, past and future. It is part of the personality software created at birth that is common to all humans and which makes us behave human. When the love software begins to play, the unconscious mind drives the dynamics with the same goals in mind for all humans. It is actually dual software with one aspect in each of two people. The software will interact to create a dual collective dynamics, with the males induced into their collective spin and the female's into theirs.

 

Where the story differs from purely natural software interaction is due to the nature of personal programming. The ego has a very important impact of the data base of memory. The software needs to use that memory and in doing so, will cause a collective phenomena, to become somewhat tailored to temporal individual. Most of the problems of love is not due to defects in the personality software, but in the social/individual memory grid that the software will have to make use of.

 

The interactive software, beginning with the personal memories of two people, will attempt to create it own optimized interactive memory grid. The memories of evoloving love. Much of the pain of love is the resistance of the ego to an individual motivational memory wash associated with one-side software. The dual software needs a more natural memory grid to function at a natural level. While induction and resistance, can create an even more aberrated memory grid.

 

To make things even more complicated there appear to be three layers to the love software, based on experience and observation. The base layer is connected to sexuality and other natural instincts. The male is male and female is female. The cross dynamics typically begin with the male. The traditional male initiation of sexuality and providing food and security has its basis at this level.

 

The second layer is cross sexual, with the female male and the male female. The female's masculine side programs the emotional nature of a male's female side by pushing his buttons, to help bring emotions to consciousness. An unnatural woman can be detremental to male's female side, since it may only push part of the buttons, i.e, child or tyrant. The male's female side is the basis for charm and illusions that can make a women's heart/mind spin. It is also a type of button pushing software. An unnatural male can also be deterimental to a female by narrowing the range of induction, i.e., fantasy without much realiy. This irrational software is theoretically suppose to push all the female's buttons good and bad, so a female can experience the dynamic range of her personality

 

The third level is less conscious. The normal sexual orientations return with the male male and the female female. In the ideal world, this aspect of the male is something like rational common sense and in a female is often called female intuitions. Typcially these aspects of the software begin with cultural programming through education, placing a temporal limitation on their natural interaction. But eventually the programming can become more natural as the male begins to trust his wife's female intuitions and she begins to trust her husband's rational common sense.

 

Where things gets even more complicated, is that higher level layers of the love software will attempt to progress lower level layers with the same sexual valence. For example, the female's masculine side will attempt to program and progress the lower level male side of the male. This makes the natural male animal more domesticated. The natural male may resist if he feels he is becoming too unnatural. The female side of the male will attempt to program the lower level female side of a female, so she responds to his emotional physical instinctive needs. If the natural female feels she is being made unnatural she may resist.

 

The highest level software will attempt to influence and progress the cross sexual components of the middle level. The highest level masculine side of the male (common sense) will attempt to program and progress the masculine side of the female to make her less reliant of cart blanche social dogma and more on the common sense needed for their fluid situation. While the upper female side of the female will attempt to program the illusionary and often moody nature of a male's female side so it is more in tuned with reality. It is all useful, but the emotions and spin needs to be more in tune to the needs of the real situation.

 

With all the complexity going on, it is a wonder love ever sticks. The reason it does is that the unconscious mind still controls 90% of the brain.