Whom should I date ???

[jonekate]

:eek2: I’m a female student and I am seriously confused about my sexuality. I spend most of my social life getting drunk, so that I don’t have to face this problem. I have dated guys, but I never get very close to them. Girls make me feel safe and I can relate better to them. I may sound like I am straight and they are just best friend, but I recently met a girl at university and took an instant liking to her and dated her a few times –that’s different to the way I feel about my other mater; I just want to be near her. I’d love to tell her about my feelings, but I don’t know her well enough and she can blab to other and made my life a misery.

 

Should I date men only, am I straight?

 

Kate Jones

:friday:

[Queso]

obviously not!

 

You like her, don't you?

 

Know yourself, then you'll understand your relationship with others better.

 

There's love everywhere, I wish you truth.

 

Welcome to the forums.

[Racoon]

yeah, umm OK.

Nice introduction Kate...

 

Get professional psychological help, or just "flow" with your feelings.

 

discussing your sexual orientation in your Hello, isn't exactly what this forum is about.

Just sayin'...

[InfiniteNow]

Kate took a very difficult chance by exposing herself as a first post, and that should be commended. Clearly, this issue is important to her. I would say that she was using this site as a way to breach a topic which is, for many, quite difficult to discuss without the benefit of anonymity, and sometimes just saying it or typing it can be relieving.

 

Do what feels right, and what doesn't cause you internal suffering. We have evolved as social creatures, and of course it matters what others think, but not if it makes you sad and unhealthy.

 

 

Welcome to Hypography. I do, however, want to echo a small portion of Racoon's post and ask that you ask questions scientifically, stuff like the biology or psychology of sexual orientation, as we haven't raised enough funds to yet purchase a Freudian couch. ;)

 

 

Cheers. :rant:

[Queso]

Be nice!

[Racoon]

Be nice!

 

So, Kate.. What are you studying at University?

What other interests do you have?

 

I like puppies and ice cream ;)

[cwes99_03]

Kate, I don't know what university you are in (or even what country) but there are trained psychologists to help people discuss these feelings at most, and most are free to visit as they are paid by the university, and as always they are confidential. I don't think anyone here is qualified to give you a proper answer, since these things often require an in depth understanding of the entire situation. Thus the answers above should be taken not with a grain but a great big lump of salt.

[CraigD]

I’m a female student and I am seriously confused about my sexuality. … Should I date men only, am I straight?

Welcome to hypography, Kate. I think you’ll find us a welcoming place where we’ll criticize only any confusion you have about science, not your sexuality :shrug:

 

Now, since you seem to be soliciting it, and since many of us amateur psychologists love to give it, on to your personal issues!

I spend most of my social life getting drunk, so that I don’t have to face this problem.

IMHO, habitually getting drunk is far more likely to pose a serious problem for you than being gay. It is also far more likely to effect the quality of your education.

I’d love to tell her about my feelings, but I don’t know her well enough and she can blab to other and made my life a misery.

Gay or straight, it’s important to gain enough experience with a potential lover that you can be open and emotionally intimate.

 

Usually, you can begin to learn about a person’s attitudes, ethics, and sexual orientation by just discussing these subjects in a hypothetical way, eg: “what do you think of people that blab to others about things said in privacy?” or “What do you think about lesbians?” Sometimes you can contrive a situation where it’s easy to bring these subjects up – watching a movie about confidence-keeping and lesbians is an easy way, and such movies are commonplace. Your friend may say “I always keep secrets, and I’d love to be a lesbian with you!” in which case, you can be free to explore a sexual relationship, and become less confused about your sexuality. Or she may make it clear that she’s exclusively heterosexual, in which case you won’t be able to explore these things with her – though you can still have a happy and close relationship.

 

Gays, straights, and people with all sorts of sexualities in between have happy and fulfilling lives. It’s not unusual to be uncertain about one’s sexuality. If you follow the simple rule of being kind to others, and treating them as you’d like to be treated yourself, everything should be alright with you, too.

[pgrmdave]

Hey, try googling any part of that first post, or jonekate, or "Whom should I date ???" (with a space before the three question marks).

[InfiniteNow]

Here I am trying to be all sweet and it's a friggin spam bot! Good catch dave.

[Racoon]

Here I am trying to be all sweet and it's a friggin spam bot! Good catch dave.

 

Yeah...

Guess who was right first time? Trust your instincts.

 

sheesh, are the guys posting here really wanting some slutty lesbian action going?

:)

[cwes99_03]

I think the one post on one thread gave it away.

[Tormod]

sheesh, are the guys posting here really wanting some slutty lesbian action going?

 

...and suddenly Hypography *exploded* out of ten thousand library monitors when the porn filter kicked in. :D

 

BTW isn't it cool that WE rank #1 though. :evil:

[learnin to learn]

dang, I was about to respond to her! good thing I read the entire thread!:evil: