InfiniteNow Posted June 17, 2007 Report Posted June 17, 2007 PART 1 PART 2 PART 3 PART 4 PART 5PART 6 PART 7 “Aye matey,” replied Jim Beam’s parrot when offered an eternal world peace.Unfortunately, circumstances became grim… Super Grim… Grimmer than grim… Slimmer than slim, and more dire than shear fire, when… I had that quaint desire. A desire to kick a clown before he was able to laugh hysterically at his unfortunate incident with mutant dragon-donkey babies, hungry for the thrill of giggles. Within his bubbles, I saw a small object which resembled a peanut, yet more round, but it had definite oblong attributes. Then, it spoke, and told me, “Do you know that when you listen to peanuts, you’re batshit crazy! Don’t worry, damn crazy peanut, have a drink of your choice. It’s on the other side of the universal house.” Peanuts are liars, so always take precautions when confiding in all nuts. Right… So, up she goes, as Prometheus realizes that she’ll fall down. The poor sod falls and eats, and laughed when she fell down into something funky. The philosopher contemplated how much beer a woodchuck chugs if a woodchuck could chug beer, but… I digress. It must be, as I am no really ready to divulge the incantations used. I welcome suggestions of all types for psyilly diplomacy to eat caps. These caps will enlarge the brains of the monkeys who paint portraits and listen to Jr. Gong. The tunes sent a rather disturbing rhythm to the next city, which lied to you. Oh, soulless city, the time has come where charring barbies and daytime soapies convene upon the ashes of your dead cat remains. I pray thee let us sing, and, left legless, stubs can grow when fertilized regularly by nurse juice from nurse’s charcoal-drip irrigation device which was attached surgically to the nasal passage. When she bent over and flatulated across the charcoal it adsorbed nothing. It stank! The world has finally ended! Run, save yourselves, it is about to morph into something that will eat into space-time itself. The Indifibulum awakens in a strange bed totally hung-over because it drank from a bedpan. In spite of all of our warnings, people still jump off of high-rise buildings while chasing pigeons. Always turn left when evading aliens. They don’t expect the unexpected, except when it’s expected to be unexpected. Now, about those aliens, they really know their stuff, considering the fact that they are aliens and aren’t responsible for the size of supernovas or green pineapples or border fences. Hopefully, this will stop when time ends outdated immigration restrictions. Restrictions that were restricting the unrestricted… to the point of realized freedom. But, this freedom is only available without batteries included with the purchase. Well said, next time, we will bake banana cake to prove beyond all doubt that Chendoh is god. This profound realization, being banana dependent, relies heavily upon a constant supply of mineral resources and plenty of bananas. Of course, apples are laced with Chamu’se… Chendoh’s elixir which reputedly repels ladies and rabbits. “Awww,” sighed Pan as he fluted his way. On his flute, the waves began… the wind howled electric nymphs and swashbuckling pirates who don’t know a thing about deodorant. Dance into the galley, playing banjos while drinking swill, conducting flamboyant experiments to entice the mermaids to dinner. They were beautiful… Sirens! Oh no! Shagadelic, but fatal! Still, they lure loneliness and love to us swashbucklers, but not to me. And, why not? Because, my past is left behind to forget the time dilation created when I jump at the velocity of light. Until I become… BEEFCAKE! With my eye on the redhead and fingers on my belt buckle, I commanded the big black bounding to jump... now into the abyss of the sirens, as sailors sailed circularly around themselves. The most important thing to remember when facing a pissed off woman is to ensure she can’t bite or, take delight in slowly torturing your inner beast. When hypliths collide a compound forms that supersedes all photons and time measured by a Swatch. When measured by Seiko, the difference is not unprofound in that the quantization of space-time becomes more pronounced when entering the higher dimensions. When these dimensions coalesce, a super dimension unfolds through the Klein bottle geometry of 8-dimensional mobius congenital facial diplegia… A condition you get from kissing and listening to Brittany Spears while playing your harmonica, your banjo, and an old soft shoe. Fortunately, a cure that would involve bosons is developing on the ISS with the help of superluminal beings who decided to fellate Georgian infants. Georgian law forbids anything fun. Repressed, peaches create a fascist and racist dictatorship that is quite funny and tasty too. With red beans, wine converts protein into large gaseous volumes which encompass everything… and smells badly. Prompting a colonoscopy, Quote
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