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Everybody has a Dan Quale moment...


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Posted

...and that's the topic, here.

 

Every now and then, some clever person makes a dumbass statement, and this is the spot to record them for a few guffaws so that they don't disappear into the mists of history!

Posted

First one:

 

"Further delay in release of this archive material would be unjust to Holocaust survivors, — virtually all of whom are now elderly — still seeking compensation for the unspeakable crimes of the Nazi regime," Biden wrote Dec. 15 in a letter to British Ambassador Sir David Manning.

(from Yahoo, here)

 

- as opposed to the teenage Holocaust survivors?:)

Posted
His most famous blunder was when he corrected student William Figueroa's correct spelling of "potato" as "potatoe" at an elementary school spelling bee in Trenton, New Jersey, on June 15, 1992.[4] According to his memoirs, Quayle was uncomfortable with the version he gave, but did so because he decided to trust incorrect written materials provided for the event by the school. Quayle was widely lambasted for his apparent inability to spell the word "potato." Figueroa was a guest on Late Night with David Letterman and was asked to lead the pledge of allegiance at the 1992 Democratic National Convention. The event became a lasting part of Quayle's reputation.

Quayle was standing next to the teacher who was conducting the spelling bee. On her flashcards the teacher had written POTATOE. And when the student spelled it without the 'e', Quayle said, "Isn't there supposed to be an 'e'?" The rest is history.

 

Bill

Posted

While watching a baseball game a few years ago, Milwaukee Brewers radio announcer Darron Sutton (son of Hall of Famer Don Sutton) was discussing the Brewers slim chance for post season play that year with color commentator Bill Schroeder.

 

What Darron was trying to say : " The Brewers are still in the wild card hunt."

What he actually said : " The Brewers are still in the wild hard ****."

Oops.

  • 1 month later...
  • 1 month later...
Posted

So my dear sister is studying art. One of her assignments is a wooden sculpture, where they get to play around with stains and stuff. So she's got this bottle of woodstain. And as she was working, she got thirsty, and opened a Coke. And, of course, parked the Coke next to the woodstain. So, after a few hours of hard labour, she gripped the Coke bottle and took a might swig out of it, wiping her brow, appreciating the hard work she's done so far. Only to realise that she had a mouth full of woodstain.

 

Now, a mouth is a funny thing. If you intentionally fill it with any liquid, the natural reaction is to swallow. Even after you've realised it's not what you intended to put there. So the swallow-reflex did its job amicably, and she took a big fat swallow of woodstain. To be promptly followed up by that saviour of Swallowers of Funny Things, the Puke Reflex. Which also did its job amicably. As a matter of fact, it worked so well that the rest of her sculpture needing woodstain, got it. Like a human spraygun, so to speak.

 

That doesn't sound too harsh, now does it? Swallow some crap and puke? Not at all!

 

Problem is - the crap she swallowed, was built to stain stuff. And stain stuff it did. My sister now has teeth of the most beautiful dark teak persuasion. The dentist said it should come off in about three months with regular brushing. He can't take it off with any chemicals, 'cause his carpentry skills are a bit rusted. He also can't use any abrasives without screwing her enamel. So, for the next three months, my sister looks like something out of a horror movie. But I'm laughing my *** off, nonetheless. Good thing we don't live together, I'd get the fright of my life every time I walk into her in the middle of the night...

  • 6 months later...
Posted

Dan Quayle was a piker compared to George W, and he was fairly harmless.

 

One of Bush's examples:

 

"As John Howard accurately noted when he went to thank the Austrian troops there last year..."

--George W. Bush, referring to Australian troops as "Austrian troops," APEC Business Summit, Sept. 7, 2007

 

Lots more where that came from at Bushisms - Funny George Bush Quotes Updated Frequently, which is one of many.

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